The One Where Everything Sort Of Turns Out Okay
by quietandsneaky
Summary: *Not an Evy story* Preseries. Mary comes back from the dead after Sam runs away to Flagstaff. She isn't happy with the way John has raised her boys and throws him out.


**Disclaimer: The characters of Supernatural do not belong to me.**

 **A/N: I know I promised that my next story would be an Evy story, but this story here has been on my mind for quite a while. The extended summary is this: Mary has somehow come back from the dead as a result of Sam running away to Flagstaff. When Mary finds out the kind of life John subjected the boys too, she throws John out and refuses to allow him to see the boys for a period of three months. Sam adjusts well to the changes in routine, Dean not so much. Mary decides to confront John about the life he led with Sam and Dean, and they come to a tenuous arrangement concerning their family life going forward. This story is mostly dialogue. It starts from the point halfway through the three month restriction Mary set up.**

They'd been living in the house for exactly six weeks, and Sam had never been happier in his life. There was no training every day, no one yelling at him to stop wasting his time by playing soccer or reading, and, best of all, nothing supernatural to constantly fight. Since it was summer break, Sam was allowed to sleep in as late as he wanted and, as long as he let someone know where he was going, he could go to the park, or the movies, or just for a walk. The freedom was exhilarating. But Sam didn't use it too often. He was too eager to get to know the reason that he now had that freedom, so instead he got dressed and walked downstairs to the kitchen.

"Hi, mom."

Mary turned from the stove towards Sam. "Hi."

"What's for breakfast?" Sam asked as he walked over to give her a hug.

"Pancakes."

"My favorite." Sam said.

"I know. That's why I added these." Mary said, pointing to a bag on the counter.

Sam smiled. "Chocolate chips? Thanks, mom."

"You're welcome." Mary said. "You got any plans for today?"

"Can we do something together?"

Mary chuckled. "Sam we've been together every day for the last six weeks. Don't you want to do something with some kids your own age?"

"I'll have time for that when I go back to school. Please, mom." Sam asked.

Mary smiled. "I have to work again."  
"That's okay." Sam said. "I don't mind."

Mary had gotten a job with a friend of hers from her hunting days. They were now both retired. Her friend worked a job as a part time nurse, and needed someone to watch her three small children while she worked. It wasn't a glamorous living, but it was enough for Mary to manage, at least for now.

"Has Dean come out yet?" Sam asked.

Mary put the plate of pancakes on the table and sighed. "No."  
"I'm sorry he's been so mad at you, mom." Sam said.

"It's okay, Sammy. I understand." Mary said, reaching over to ruffle his hair. She suddenly stopped and said, "Oh, you don't like Sammy anymore, right?"

Sam smiled as he took his first bite of breakfast. "It's okay, mom. You can call me whatever you want."

Mary smiled back, stood up, wrapped one arm around Sam's neck, and kissed the top of his head. "I'm gonna go try to check on him. You eat as much as you want."

"'Kay, mom."

Mary stood up, ruffled his hair again, and walked down the hall towards Dean's room. As happy as Sam seemed to be that she was back, Dean was the opposite. At first, he had been thrilled that his family was back together. But after a few days, Mary had gotten the full picture of what life had been like while she was away, and she'd thrown John out of the house with the strict directive to not come back for three months. Sam hadn't been happy about it, but understood. Dean had been giving Mary the silent treatment ever since.

"Can I come in?"

Dean, who was sitting on the bed cleaning the blade of his knife, shrugged. "Sure."

"I made some breakfast. Are you hungry?"  
"No. Did Sam eat?"

"He's eating now." Mary said. "Are you sure you don't want to join us?"  
"No. I'm fine."

Mary sighed, trying to hold in her frustration. "Dean, I understand you're angry with me, but please talk to me."

"Only with Dad here."  
"I know it's hard for you to understand, Dean, but some time apart from your father will be good for you." Mary tried again.

"How? How is it good for me?"

"Dean, you have to understand, when you have kids…" Mary started, before being cut off by Dean.

"I did."

"What?" Mary asked, surprised.

"I did. Who do you think took care of Sam when Dad was gone?"

"That's exactly my point." Mary said, feeling slightly frustrated she was having to explain this again. "Dean, you did a wonderful job taking care of Sam. But that was not your responsibility. I trusted your father to take care of you two. To give you a life. And he let me down in every way possible."  
"So you punish me for it too?" Dean asked.

"It's not about punishing you…"

"It's about doing what's best for me. Got it." Dean seethed.

Mary frowned. "Dean, please. I'm not doing this to hurt you. All I want is for you to be happy." When Dean started laughing, Mary asked, "What's so funny?"

"You know, Dad said the same thing to Sam in that fight they had right before Sam ran away. He told Sam that putting him in the life wasn't about making him miserable. That he wanted Sam to be happy, but Sam needed to do what Dad said so he could be safe. I didn't really get what Sam said to Dad, but I think now I do."

"What did Sam say?" Mary asked.

"He said that he could follow Dad's orders or he could be happy. But he couldn't do both." Dean said. Dean took a ragged breath and put his knife down. "Mom, I'm glad you're back. I think it's amazing. Maybe even miraculous. But I don't think you really get it. I took Sam out of that house that night, mom. I took care of him and Dad every single day. And the way I got through it was by imagining you coming back and everything being okay again."  
"Dean…" Mary was crying now, with the full impact of what Dean was saying hitting her.

"But now you _are_ back," Dean said angrily, "and Dad's gone. If I had known…"

"If you'd known what, Dean?" Mary asked.

"If I had known you would have made Dad leave, I never would have wanted you to come back." Dean said. He saw Mary's face, and knew that he'd hurt her badly. But he couldn't bring himself to apologize. "Do you mind if I go out and take a walk?"

Mary nodded. "Sure."

Dean left the house, and Mary was crushed. Dean didn't hate her, but he was hurt. Deeply hurt. She knew he and John had been close, or at least much closer than John had been with Sam. But she'd honestly thought that Dean would become more understanding as time passed. Apparently that wasn't the case. Mary made her choice quickly, though she wasn't looking forward to it. She called her friend, then went back to the kitchen with Sam.

"Sam, I need you to do something for me."

"What is it, mom?" he asked.

"I need to do something on my own tonight. What do you think about babysitting for me?"

"On my own?" Sam asked. "I don't know a lot about kids."  
Mary laughed. "Dean'll be with you too. You'll do fine. Jack and Sarah like you. And if anything comes up, you can call me. Okay?"

"Okay, mom. What do you need to do? Can I help?"

"Another time, buddy." Mary said. "You done with breakfast?"

The day seemed to crawl by, but finally three o'clock rolled around, and Mary had the house to herself. She waited nervously on the couch, and at exactly half past three, there was a knock on the front door.

"Come in." Mary called.

The door opened, and John stepped through. "Hi."

"Hi." Mary answered. "Close the door. We need to talk."  
"Talk about what?"

"Everything." Mary said.  
"Are the boys all right?" John asked.

"Physically, they're fine." Mary said. "Sit down, John. We need to talk."

John took the seat on the couch directly opposite Mary. "How are you?"

"I'm okay." Mary said honestly. "But I didn't call to talk about me."  
"What then?"  
"It's Dean." Mary said. "He needs you. I called you here for him."  
"I thought you said he was okay!" John said, alarmed.

"He is. But he's miserable without you."  
"Does that mean you'll let me see them?" John asked hopefully.

"Not yet." Mary answered. "We need to hash out our own stuff first before we work out when you can see them."  
"Mary, please. I get why you're angry, but I did it for you…"  
"Don't _ever_ say that to me again." Mary said, clenching her teeth.

"Mary…"  
"No. Listen to me. Listen to me, and do not interrupt. If you want a chance of seeing Sam or Dean again, you will listen to everything I'm about to say. Understand?" Mary asked.

"Understand." John said quietly.

"John, my parents were hunters."

"What?" John asked, barely restraining himself from jumping off the couch. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Before I died and you took the boys on the road, would you have believed me?"

"Well, no." John admitted.

"Exactly. I was raised exactly the same way you raised the boys." Mary said. "Which is also the reason I never told you the truth. I wanted my boys to have the life that I never could."

John was still reeling from her revelation. "You were a hunter…"  
"John, focus!" Mary said. "Yes, I was a hunter. And that's not it. I knew the demon that killed me."  
"You knew him? What do you mean you knew him?"  
Mary swallowed hard. "You don't remember, but we were out on a date one night and you got hit by a car. You died that night, John."  
"I…I died? What the hell, Mary?"  
"Yes. You died. I made a deal with the demon that killed me to save your life." Mary said. "He saved your life, and all I had to give him in return was that in ten years, he would show up in Sam's room and I wasn't to stop him."  
"You made a deal? With a _demon_?"

"Yes, John, I did." Mary said. "Because I was stupid enough to think that I had a chance at a life with you."  
"We still can…"  
"No. No, John, we can't. I might have been able to forgive you if you had just been too hard on the boys. But you did so much more than that. John, you didn't _raise_ them at all."

"Of course I did…" John objected.

"What did I say about not interrupting?" Mary said, and John's mouth snapped shut. "John, I remember being up at the top of that ceiling. I knew I was going to die. But my last thought, before I took that last breath, was that they would be okay with you. That they'd be safe."

"They were safe. I taught them…"  
"You shouldn't have just taught them to stay safe. I expected you to be there to keep them safe. John, to say that I'm disappointed in you is too gentle a word. I trusted you with my children. With their safety, their wellbeing, their _lives_. And in return for that trust, you either left them with strangers or left them alone. You left my children alone, cold, hungry, scared. Or worse, you took them hunting with you, and threw them in the path of only who knows what. I cannot, and will not, forgive you for that."

John nodded. "I understand."  
"Good. Because I'm not through yet." Mary said. "Time to talk about Dean."  
"What about him?"

"You have put more on him than he should ever have had to handle." Mary said. "He's the reason I said that you didn't raise them. Dean raised Sam. That boy doesn't know what it means to just be a kid. How could you take that away from him?"

"I didn't want to…"  
"And you didn't have to." Mary said. "John, the one thing I was always grateful about when my parents were hunting was that after I was born, one of them was always with me. My dad trained me, but I was never alone. I was certainly never alone when I was _seven years old_."

John flinched. The boys had been seven and three the first time he'd left them alone.

"And Sam. John, in six weeks, Sam has probably asked me fifty questions about myself. What's my favorite food? Favorite color? How did we meet? What were you like when we were married? What was I like when I was a little girl? All those questions. I finally asked him one night what he knew about me. He told me that when he tried to ask you or Dean any questions about me, the only thing you would tell him was that I died in his room, and that you were hunting to try and find the thing that killed me. When he asked for more than that, he got yelled at and made to feel ashamed." Mary said. "John, did I mean so little to you that you couldn't even tell our little boy about me?"

"Mary, no. God, no. You meant everything to me."  
"Then why not tell Sam that?" Mary asked. "For the first two weeks I had them here, every time he asked me a question about me, he'd say 'Mom, I didn't mean to bother you. You don't have to answer if you don't want to.' He's so afraid to want to know anything about his mother. You did that to him."

"I know." John said. "He's so much like you."  
"And you made him feel like that was such a bad thing that he felt like he had to run away from you."  
"Sam ran away because…"  
"Because he asked you if he could be a _child_ and go to a sleepover. If he could spend time with other children his own age. And from what he tells me, it's not the first time the two of you have had a screaming match over something that he should be able to take for granted."

"Mary, it's not safe for him to be going out after dark."  
"Bullshit!" Mary almost shouted, making John jump again. "John, am I denying that it can be dangerous for him to go out? No. But let me explain something to you. The likelihood of something supernatural happening to him while he was out is something like one in ten thousand. The likelihood of something natural happening to him is maybe one in two hundred. For Sam to be happy and content, I'm willing to take those odds. Will I worry about him? Yes. But for the chance that he'll come home smiling and happy, I'm willing to go through that."

"I just…I had already lost you. I wasn't willing to take the chance of losing Sam."

Mary sighed again. "John, I know you love those boys. I don't doubt that. Dean told me about you crying when Sam was missing. The problem is this. Dean believes your love for him is based on how well he does his job. He thinks you hate him because Sam ran away. He thinks when he screws up, you just tell him you love him to be nice. And Sam? Sam thinks you only love Dean unconditionally, and that you only pretend to care about him because Dean does."

"They told you all of this?" John asked.

"They didn't have to, John. I talked to them. It didn't take long for me to figure it out. Now do you want to see them or not?"  
"Of course I do."

"Then I have conditions. If you break them, it's over." Mary said. "First of all, I'm not going to make you quit hunting. I know from experience it's too hard to get out of your system once you've started. But Sam is done hunting. He is too caring and sensitive for it. He deserves to have a chance to go to school, to play sports, to do school plays, whatever _he_ wants to do."  
John nodded. "Got it."  
"Second, don't ever let me hear of you calling Sam selfish for wanting to live his own life again. He is twelve. He's a child. He's supposed to be selfish."  
"Understood."  
"Third. I know you want to punish Sam for running away. That's not happening."  
"We can't just let him get away with it." John objected.

"We can and we are. He ran because of you, John. Which leads to my next condition. You're apologizing to Sam."  
"I didn't do anything wrong."  
"And neither did he." Mary explained. "You made him feel like he was selfish, like he was a burden, like he was a terrible person. He didn't just run away because you told him he couldn't go to a sleepover, John. He ran away because he was tired of the fighting between the two of you. Fighting that was just as much your fault as it was his. Sam feels bad for running away on you too, even though it led to finding me. He's prepared to apologize to you too, but I won't let him do it unless you agree to take equal responsibility."

John didn't want to admit it, but he knew she was right. "Agreed."  
"Okay. Good. Now about Dean." Mary said. She laughed when John's mouth dropped open; he clearly thought the conversation was winding down. "Don't worry. My list for Dean isn't as long as it is with Sam. I only want you to do two things with him. First, apologize to him like you need to do with Sam. For leaving him and Sam alone so much, and for putting too much responsibility on him."  
"No problem." John said sincerely, and unlike his apology to Sam, he totally agreed with this one.

"Second, I want you to talk to Dean about either going back to school or getting his GED. I won't make him go to college, but I'd like you to talk to him about considering it. When he turns eighteen, if he still wants to, I won't stop him from going hunting with you again. But it will be Dean's choice, not yours, and you will talk to him about it rather than ordering it. Do I make that clear?"

"Yes." John said simply. "Is that all?"

"Not quite. I'm still not willing for us to get back together. But, since it will be best for the boys to have us both here as often as possible, when you're not hunting, you can stay here." Mary said. "If you want to. But like I said, no hunting with Sam, and no hunting with Dean until he's older. And we work as a team with Sam and Dean. That means we make decisions together."  
"Of course." John said. "Mary, thank you."  
"You're welcome." Mary answered.

"And Mary? I'm sorry. I know I let you down as far as Sam and Dean go. I realized that at some point along the way, but I was so far down the road on what I was doing and so wrapped up I thought it was too late to quit." John said.

Mary smiled. "And to think. You once told me you didn't think you knew how to apologize."

John smiled back. "Do you think there's ever a chance, even a miniscule one…?"  
"Maybe." Mary admitted. "Maybe. But first, our boys need the chance to be boys. You let that happen, and let them get to be happy, then…we'll talk."  
"Deal." John said. "Deal."  
"Alright. The boys should be home in a couple of hours. You want some dinner?"

"That sounds great." John agreed.

The two hours together went by quickly, and Mary was surprised how easy the conversation went. They reminisced about old times between them, and talked a little more about their arrangement from that point forward. When John asked how she was making ends meet, he promised to send her money from the road as often as possible. When the front door finally opened, John heard Sam and Dean's voices drifting through to the kitchen.

"Mom? You home?" Sam called.

"In here boys! Both of you come in here, I need to talk to you."

Before Mary could even process them standing in the kitchen, Dean's joyous voice filled the kitchen. "Dad!"

"Hey, Dean!" John said, returning Dean's rare hug gladly. "I missed you, Ace."  
"I missed you too, Dad." Dean held on to John as he looked at Mary. "I thought you said he couldn't see us for six more weeks."  
"I decided I'd rather see you happy." Mary said.

Dean let go of John and walked over to Mary. "Thank you, mom."

"You're welcome, Dean. I mean that. I'm sorry it made you so miserable to be away from your father. I never should have done that to you."  
"And I shouldn't have been so mean to you. I'm sorry." Dean said.  
"I forgive you. You forgive me?"  
"Of course I do." Dean said, grabbing Mary in the same kind of hug he'd given John.

Sam was standing next to his father, somewhat more awkwardly than Dean had been. "Hi, Dad."  
"Hi, Sam. I missed you too, buddy."  
"Dad, I'm sorry I ran away." Sam said.  
"And I'm sorry I drove you away, Sam. I'm sorry you felt like I didn't care about you. Sam, I love you, son. More than anything. And I'm sorry I put you through the life I did. You deserved better than that." Sam, not sure what to say to the unexpected apology, stood there speechless as John turned to Dean. "Dean, same goes for you. I've put way, way too much on your shoulders. You've done an amazing job with all of it, especially taking care of Sam. But I never should have put it on you. I hope you boys can forgive me for all of it one day."

"Dad?" Sam asked nervously. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to hunt…"  
"Sam, Dean, this is how it's gonna be. Sam, you don't have to hunt anymore. You're going to stay here and go to school, make friends, whatever you want. Your life is yours now, buddy. We'll be here to help, but the way your life goes is up to you."  
Sam grinned. "Thanks, guys."

"Dean, you've got two choices. You can go back to high school or you can get your GED. One or the other. And, when you turn eighteen, if you want to still hunt with your father, I won't stop you."  
"Eighteen?" Dean asked. "But I've been hunting…"  
"Dean, don't argue with your mom. We'll talk about it later, but you're on hiatus for a while. You need to finish your education."  
"Yes, sir." Dean said, sulking slightly.

"Hey." Mary said, wrapping both arms around Dean's neck. "I know it seems like forever, but trust me, it'll go by quick. In the meantime, you get your ol' mom back. How's that sound?"  
Dean smiled. "Sounds good, mom."

"Dad, where're you gonna be?" Sam asked.

"Your dad'll stay here with us when he's not hunting, Sam."

"Are you going hunting again soon, Dad?" Sam asked. "I'd like all of us to spend some time together if we could."  
John, slightly surprised that it was Sam making the request and not Dean, didn't have the heart to turn him down. "Sounds good, son. Sounds good."


End file.
